One Crazy/Exhausting/Interesting/Awesome Year

 I've been putting off doing this blog post for awhile.. If you know me this is NOT surprising.. I wait until the last minute to do everything and then scramble around like a chicken with its head cut off ( I couldn't use duck in this example.. I had to sacrifice the chicken so the duck could live) to get whatever task done at the last minute.. It is not my proudest attribute but it is indeed my attribute.. I am proud of the fact that it took me under a month to do this post (Life is measured in small victories.. I rocked this post 3 days before the month deadline..). I made a small outline today but I am sure it is missing hundreds of stories that I will later have to blog about later about my adventures of my first year of marriage.. I am hoping to let everyone in on the highlights of what I learned from marriage and not scare people from marrying.. No matter how sarcastic/mean/unhappy I may sound about a particular story, it has been 100% worth it.. (I won't go over 100% as my math brain would be on overload on how that would have to be a mixed fraction and we don't go over 100%..) I'm tutoring math tomorrow to get this craziness out of my system.. Enjoy!

I started my adventure as a married lady on 07/30/2011.. It was a hot end of summer day without rain (the wivestale is that if it rains on your wedding day then you will be wealthy..Fitting for us that it didn't.. Well played God..).. I slept well the night before my wedding (I drugged myself.. Thank you sleep aid).. The day started with all of us girls getting prettier (I have some seriously hot friends/family).. We took pictures before the big moment.. Curt and I didn't see each other before the big moment but looking back on it I wish we did.. We could have actually talked before the big I do/I don't segment.. Besides, it is hard to be romantic with a Catholic priest looming 2 feet from you.. (If you have any bad catholic jokes/comments, check them at the door or tell me when I have been drinking and think it would be hilarious ;).. I just remember the wedding being long and waiting for it to be over.. Hello, we were in it for the reception.... Boy, I know I am biased but I had a blast at our reception.. We have gotten lots of compliments on the party we threw.. Hell we may be responsible for relationships/babies.. Curt and I have it on our bucket list to have a vow renewal.. Basically this is an excuse for all of our friends to get together and kick it again when we are "old".. My theory is that you go to work to live.. I would love to spend my hard earned money on another party to experience the thrill of the first wedding.. I think this may be the secret to marriages.. Have a vow renewal! You get to rekindle the love, drink and buy a new pretty dress... Mark your calendars for 07/30/2016!


Now from the wedding to the first married fight.. Dun, Dun, Duuuun! This happened on 08/01/2011.. Yes.. Exactly 2 days almost to the moment from the wonderful I Do moment... We were going to Jamaica (amazing by the way... We loved, loved, loved it!.. If Katie Denning is reading this she will understand the humor... ) and Curt was trying to be all macho/manly by taking charge in the airport.. This is hard for me as I am bossy.. Very bossy.. But since I was still on wedding bliss, I let control go.. Curt marched up to the desk of the airline and got our tickets...... He also decided to leave BOTH of our passports on the desk counter... We had waited in line for about 30 minutes (the airport was a zoo and Kristin we aren't sophisticated enough to travel in the business line) and I asked Curt to give me my passport as we were almost to the passport checker dude (who was scary).. Curt had a look of panic and then decided to blame his mess up on me by saying he gave the passports to me.... Wrong! I may be old and married but I did not turn forgetful in 2 days.. He ran as fast as he could to the airline desk (I am sure this was comical to the people beind us.. If I wasn't so mad, I may have laughed also) and luckily they had our passports.. This was our first married fight.. I nicely informed Curt that I would kill and divorce him if he cost us our honeymoon.. I took over after that and we got to our destination safely and soundly.. Yay first married fight!! First and only... Hahaha yeah right!!

Okay so a big thing with marriage for me was giving up my last name.. Hence my blog name.. Btw, I am very impressed with my creativeness in coming up with this name.. Go me! Anway, I told Curt right after we got engaged that I was NOT changing my last name.. A little background on Curt, he is always really calm and rarely picks his battles....... So when he fought this battle with a dang bazuka, I knew I was in trouble.. He says it is because when we have kids that our kids are not confused (good point C. Byrd) but I really think the main reason for him wanting me to take his name is solely pride.. He takes great pleasure in calling me Hannah Byrd.. I should be happy that he isn't calling me Mrs. Byrd because I really haven't gotten used to that in the 13 months we have been married.. That is still his Mom and just not me.. I know there is some lady reading this blog saying how in the world could a woman not want to take her husband's last name.. I know those girls.. The ones who put Betty Crocker to shame and have dreamed their whole life to be Mrs. So and So... That is so not me.. It's not that I don't want to be married to Curt but I just don't want to change my whole identity.. I mean, what was wrong with Hannah Schiermeier?! You liked her enough to marry her and now you want to chang her name? Ughh... Schiermeier was unique and people always asked questions about it... Granted it was normally how to spell it but still! I was never a girl to write on my trapper keeper (wow.. oldschool) Mrs. So and So.. Okay, I will admit that Mrs. Justin Timberlake may have been doodled somewhere on my belongings but that doesn't count! I did ask Curt if he would like to be Curt Schiermeier and he looked at me with disgust.. I then told him that I didn't like it either! As you can tell, I gave in.. Honestly Byrd is much easier but I still think of myself as Hannah Schiermeier.. I think Hannah Schiermeier was probably way cooler than Hannah Byrd so I don't really want to see her go.. I smile a little bit when I check my student loan balance as it is still under Hannah Schiermeier.. I then cry when I see my remaining balance remaining..

The whole year I have been married I have been having mini mental breakthroughs realizing that I am indeed an old married duck.. A couple of weeks ago at work they made us fill out an emergency contact just in case I find a way to severly hurt myself from my office chair.. My whole life when I saw emergency contact my first response is Laura Schiermeier.. Relationship-Mother.. It dawned on me, I think I would offend Curt if I put my mom as an emergency contact.. I mean, if I somehow managed to hurt myself at work who would I want them to call? Do I think Curt should make my medical decision? I mean he is my husband but he has never once made a medical choice about me.. I am pretty proud of myself that I haven't had to see a doctor in like 5 years.. I hope I don't drop dead in myself after this huge jinx... I did finally fill in my emergency contact card with Curt Byrd-Spouse.. I secretely hope that if I get hurt he calls my mom... He won't know this as I won't let him read my blog.. We will know if he has been cheating and reading my blog if this situation occurs and he calls my mom and asks her for advice..

Money..... More importantly, joint bank account... We had separate bank accounts for about a month until I walked into my bank and asked them to change my new with my new license which I had to have every proof of identity on earth to get and they said no because I didn't have a marriage license.... Oh I pulled a Kristin Wiederholt (not Glaza.. not ever.. sorry) and demanded for them to close my account because it is crazy that one can't change a name on a bank account with a new license.. So therefore I was left with no choice but to make the dreaded journey to Curt's bank and open a joint bank account.. Yeah it has worked out and we have been able to communicate on money, which is good, but it also sucked at first.. Before the conversion over to Byrd, I could go shopping and buy a nice new shirt and no one but me and the processor at the bank would know how much it cost.. Now, thanks to online banking, my husband also knows.. However, his wife, this lady duck, also knows how much he spends on his 22nd fishing pole at Bass Pro.. It look a little adjustment and honesty but we have worked it out. Plus, I get to spy on my birthday/christmas/valentine's day gifts.. I had no idea I was getting flowers for Valentine's Day until I was checking on our account and saw he ordered flowers a month in advance.. Good job Curt! I didn't tell him I knew about the flowers because he was so, so proud of himself for surprising me..... It is little secrets like this that make a marriage go round.. I probably shouldn't post it on an open blog forum but whatever.. I have a strong feeling that mainly woman are reading this anyway..

Kids.. I won't spend much time on this topic because I know this will be brought up in the future sometime but I do have to comment on how this whole conversation changes when you get married.. On 07/29/2011 no one in their right mind even suggested we have kids because, God forbid, we weren't married.. On 07/30/2011, the world let us have our peace.. On 07/31/2011, everyone wants to know when/how/if we are practicing on having kids.. Holy smokes.. It is amazing what adding an extra ring to your left hand will do for this conversation.. I mean you get this topic from people whom you never, ever want to discuss how kids are made with... This is a hard topic for us though too.. I mean it isn't like the rest of your life when you just knew when to do it.. Marriage was easy because we both were graduated and I told Curt we either get engaged by Christmas or he may die.. Kids is a different subject.. Holy cow, when do you know you are ready for a kid.. Somneone once told me that you are never ready for a kid but you have them anyway.. I'll be sure to blog about this topic when someone actually happens but right now, we are going to Mexico in 2 weeks and that is my most important thought..

Sleeping.. Okay most people who know me also know that I LOVE to sleep.. Notice how I put love in capslock.. It is very important in my life.. Curt and I have a snug double bed we sleep on everynight.. It was free from college so I have no complaints.. However, if I was a small little duck it would be easier to sleep.. I don't really like to be touched at all when I sleep and that is hard in this small of bed.. We do have a twin bed in our guest room and it appears to be very comfy.. We don't want to buy a new bed until we finally buy a house so we are stuck with what we have.. However it occured to me a short time ago that we could bring the twin bed in our room (our room is huge btw) and we could sleep in the same room but in separate beds.. It was brilliant! We could both have our own space in bed but be in the same room.. Curt was completely against this move and he even yelled at me if I knew the divorce rate of married couples who don't sleep in the same bed.. I advised that we would at least be in the same room and the situation isn't because we are mad but just because we can't get a new bed yet.... Besides, how does he know divorce rates? Is he just looking up divorce stats for funsies? Anway, we decided to wait it out in one bed (ugh) and we will get a king/queen bed as soon as we buy a house.. I can live with this arrangement.. The things your sacrifice (your own dang sleeping space in bed) when you decide to get married.. However, the nights he isn't here to crowd my space, I honestly miss him to pieces.. I also think a robber is going to break in and kill me but that robber won't kill me if he is sleeping like the dead next to me.....

Speaking of no space, hello in marriage you live with someone.. Suddenly you understand why your mother didn't mind a quiet house and being left alone for a bit.. Suddenly you live with someone and that someone is always there.. I remember the weekends in college when we saw each other once a week and couldn't wait to see each other and spend every waking moment together.. This changes when you get married.. Oh honey you want to play Madden for 3 hours tonight, just make sure you do the dishes before hand and that will be fine.. He thinks he is catching a break as he only has to do dishes then he can dive into his undefeated Madden season but in reality you get to dive in to trashy reality TV, your book, the entire bed to yourself, and enjoy a moment to yourself.. It is something that definitely takes some getting used to in the least but it is nice to have someone on the couch next to you on a Friday night when you are chilling.. However, I do not take the few moments I get to myself for granted anymore..

Lifestyles... I sort of skated around this subject earlier but I am going to hit in on the head now.. Curt and I grew up very differently.. His parents are way more conservative than mine so we are used to doing things differently.. I am sure this will come to light more once we have kids but that is a journey we aren't taking right now.. When we were going car shopping because his Chevy Malibu (The green grasshopper) was on the fritz this difference became apparent. He was going to take charge and get advice from all the other men to make this big decision.. (conservative).. I was going to go out and buy this dang car by what I wanted because I am a woman and dang it, I can make decisions on my own (modern).. We had a HUGE fight over purchasing a vehicle.. It was our first really big purchase and honestly, we failed miserably at communicating.. We both had to give a little as he wanted a Camry which was out of our price range and I wanted a Chevy HHR since it was way under our price range... We settled for our highly efficient 2009 Toyota Corolla (the black jag).. We compromised by buying a very basic model so it would be almost the price of an HHR. It was a good decision by us.. We joke that we are both going to implode when we have to buy a house but I think we will do better as we know how to communicate better now...... Or I hope to God we do.. :)

In summary, marriage is a lot of work.. It is not just a big game of playing house but it is totally worth it.. It takes a lot of work and constant communication with compromise but I wouldn't take back a second of the first year..... No that is a lie, I would take back some of it but I think that is normal.. I am sure I will think of more important marriage wisdom to share in the future so expect a second post.. As always, thanks for reading!

H. Byrd.............................. or H. Schiermeier ;)